Inspiration with Jeff Foster

FOR A FRIEND

"Friend, I know your heart is broken, I know the future seems unclear to you, I know you feel the absence of answers right now, I know you feel a terrible longing for something you cannot name.

But let's begin where we are. Let’s not focus on the thousands of steps that will come on the path, but the place where we stand on the path right now. And there is only now.

Know that many others have gone through what you are going through, and remember that sometimes it seems darkest before the dawn. But instead of longing for the dawn, and rejecting the darkness, let us touch the dark parts with gentleness; let us shine our light there. Let us meet what is present, not rush towards what is not yet present. For even the darkest cave may contain treasure, and even the most intense and uncomfortable feelings may actually contain strange medicine.

Walk your path courageously, friend, and know that loved ones walk with you."

A CONVERSATION WITH LONELINESS

"I feel lonely."
"Wonderful. An invitation to get intimate with loneliness.”
“What do you mean?”
“Try this. Drop the word 'loneliness' for a moment. Feel the raw sensations directly in the body. Where do you feel them? Feel the prickles, the tickles, the vibrations…"
"In my stomach. Like a lonely, empty feeling..."
"Great. So now drop the words ‘lonely’ and 'empty'. Connect with what's actually here without those second-hand descriptions”.
"Okay. It feels................. alive. Tingly. Warm."
"Yes. Good. Stay with it."
"It feels soft. Tender. Vulnerable. It feels like... life."
"Good. Let's stay there awhile. Let's give these sensations the gift of kind attention, without trying to change or delete them. Allow all thoughts and images, all judgements and stories, to come and go as well, in your warm presence. Let them float like clouds in the sky. What else do you notice where you are. You can place your hand on the part of you that feels lonely, if you like..."
[Places hands on stomach]
"It's strange. As I give it attention, the tightness is easing. There's more room around the lonely feeling. Like it's held by something... something large, spacious…"
"Does that sense of spaciousness itself feel lonely?"
"No. It feels... intimate. Open. Alive. Not lonely. I feel like I can breathe..."

When we stop distracting ourselves, and courageously dive into the heart of any feeling, positive or negative, right or wrong, comfortable or uncomfortable, we rediscover the vast ocean of who we are. Every feeling is made of unspeakable intelligence, and every feeling contains a hidden message.

- Jeff Foster