11 Struggles Only Overthinkers Will Understand

via Learning Mind

Overthinkers face daily challenges, worrying about and over analysing even the most insignificant situations.

We are spending more time alone, and being inundated with various forms of online communication has made us more introspective. Suddenly, we are more concerned in regards to how we appear to others and what others really mean when they talk to us. The mind of an overthinker is rarely at peace, always worried about something or another.
Here are 11 struggles all overthinkers can relate to, which will help you understand what it means to be an overthinker or will sound familiar if you are one yourself.

1. Over analysing everything

You might find yourself over analysing a particular situation or something somebody said to you. There are countless possibilities when you start to think deeply, and before you know, it snowballs into a twisted version of your original thought.

2. You find yourself interpreting a situation that happened days ago

Maybe it was an argument or just a normal conversation (well, normal for the other party that is). But you can’t stop thinking about the event and how you would have done or said things differently; instead you keep worrying about how events folded out.

3. If you are shopping and you see a friend, but they ignore you… your instant thought is full of hurt

Or are you are overwhelmed with concern for them? Instead of moving on with your day, you can’t stop thinking about the non-meeting that just happened.

4. You know those text messages, the ones you can write a thesis about, analysing their hidden meaning

Whether it is from a friend or a significant other, you can look into it so deeply that a few sentences are given a whole new deeper meaning than possibly intended. Usually, the conclusion is something terrible, am I correct?

5. When something has gone wrong, no one else can imagine the criticism you are putting on yourself

And how you struggle to come to terms with a situation that essentially causes you a lot of distress.


6. Social media has brought on a whole new level of hassle

Trying to understand if whether that tweet was about you, why has so and so unfollowed you on Instagram and so forth.


7. It’s really difficult to live in the moment

Living in the moment can be nearly impossible for someone who breaks down each moment and finds themselves thinking about a particular issue relentlessly. Instead, you are wondering what is going to happen next or worrying about a past event than just to relax and enjoy the moment.

8. Forget about trying to compartmentalise!

One thought is enough to take over your life, nibbling away at your thoughts no matter how much you try to meditate and clear your head.

9. That breakup was clearly your fault

In case you break up with your loved one, your head is full of thoughts like these: Maybe I did something wrong. What could I have done to make him/her love me more? Why has this happened to me?


10. Thinking a lot does make you more aware of other people’s feelings

Overthinkers are incredibly empathetic creatures, trying their best to figure out what is wrong with other people and how to make them feel better.


11. Sleep and meditation are some of the most difficult things to do

With our minds whirring away with one thought or another, it is really challenging to let ourselves rest.

Finally, overthinking can lead to over analysing situations or people endlessly, causing anxiety as well as misunderstanding. It turns something that would probably be normal for most people into a distressing and overwhelming experience. Daily life can be affected and whatever you do, don’t beat yourself up if you are an overthinker.

Pilgrims of Infinity

"In the vast expanse of infinite ness, our souls come together in the here and now, and connect for a moment in tIme."

via Link

Teal Swan & Metaphysics of Duality

https://youtu.be/-9mzJFUwTCo

Here Teal uses the "Metaphysics of Duality" to explain that a human is his mind/body/emotions - yet not it, yet transcendent.

This metaphysical concept (A phenomenon being A & Not A both) shows up in lots of applications of philosophy as well as Quantum Physics.

It's a very real concept though it is of course paradoxical.

Worth a listen.

Resilience

via WEFORUM



It may seem that wise, strong people typically have gone through a few hard times in their lives. By comparison, those who have led a very sheltered and privileged life often appear to crack more easily under pressure. But is it really true that some degree of pain and trauma can make us stronger? And if so, at what point does it destroy us?

Seriously traumatic events – such as accidents or terrorist attacks – can evoke fear and helplessness in the face of a threat to life or serious injury. Fear responses are often more extreme if the trauma is unsystematic and random. That’s because the utter senselessness of the situation makes it difficult for individuals to interpret what is happening around them. How does one explain the mindless murder of the innocent, for example?

These events corrupt the sense of confidence, stability and trust we have in the world. But miraculously it turns out they can actually help us be stronger – although not everyone. Indeed, psychologists have long been interested in why some individuals appear to overcome traumatic events and thrive while others appear unable to recover, continuing to suffer from post traumatic stress disorder or other mental-health problems.

Building resilience

Research on victims of serious trauma has found that about 75% of them do not appear to be significantly impaired after the incident, despite being stressed and traumatised at the time of the incident.

So what characteristics do those individuals have that are different?

First and foremost it is a quality that psychologists call resilience, the ability to cope and adapt in the face of hardship, loss or adversity. It is the capacity to deal effectively with stress and pressure and to rebound from disappointments and mistakes. A person with psychological resilience is able to solve problems and meet life’s challenges with confidence and purpose, demonstrating impressive self-renewal skills when necessary.

Whether it’s chronic illness, sexual, physical or emotional abuse or fear and threat of violence, resilient individuals have better coping success when under psychological distress, higher self-efficacy and self-esteem as well as more optimism and hope. They also tend to have fewer psychological and health-related problems. Resilient individuals are typically also internally consistent, assertive, cognitively flexible, autonomous and have a personal moral compass and an ability to face their fears.

When studying the personality traits of resilient holocaust survivors, who had suffered extreme trauma and watched their families and friends die in the camps, we found that they were characterised by optimism, creative problem solving and acceptance of their situation. These people typically reported that they always had hope that they would somehow endure and that the story of their lives would one day be told.

However, resilience does not have to come from extreme emotional and physical trauma. More than two-thirds of the general population will experience events they find traumatic in their lifetimes. Life experiences such as poverty, dysfunctional families and bullying can also have lasting impacts – it’s a dynamic interaction of a variety of influences such as personalty, coping responses and our appraisal of the trauma that shape us.

Nature versus nurture

It’s not entirely clear to what extent we are born with resilience and to what extent it is something that we learn. But it is certainly a construct that can be improved and built upon. Positive emotions help to establish a building block that broadens the domain of effective behaviours in regards to stress and trauma. However the building of resiliency must occur before a stressful situation – just like immunity to an infection or disease.

But that’s not the whole story. Actually going through a trauma can provide us with the opportunities to become more resilient to the next life-impacting event. When going through tough times we get to know ourselves and learn about the behaviours that we exhibit when stressed – and how to best manage them. This in turn also helps build confidence.

So does that mean that people with an “easy life”, who may not have had the opportunity to learn how to be resilient, are worse at it? While this could be the case, there isn’t any research on this, probably because it isn’t exactly straightforward how to define an “easy” life. What’s more, psychologists tend to study people who are traumatised – they are the ones that actually need our help. Having said that, there are people who may not have suffered much trauma but are nevertheless able to suddenly stand up and rescue 20 people from drowning instead of only saving themselves in a crisis – and this is showing a type of resilience.

Ultimately, resilience is a complicated mix of personality and experience. Each of us has the capability to get back up and carry on, whether we use it or not. Having a sense of one’s own meaning is probably the most important characteristic of building resilience – everyone has something to contribute, everyone has extraordinary possibilities and strengths. Understanding your uniqueness is the first step to recognising your worth and is one way of beginning to improve your psychological resiliency. Hopefully, just knowing that it is something we can improve can help some of us move in the right direction.